the river travel car homeless stories

"The Day I Stopped Giving a Cr#p"
When you don't have any reasons to stay, it doesn't take a whole lot to leave.  I got kicked out of college when I was 21 for not showing up to classes.  Usually schools could care less about attendance as long as they're receiving tuition but I was at UT on scholarship and they decided this free ride was over and showed me the door.  

My girlfriend broke up with me the next day because I wasn't paying rent and kept eating all her food.  I was a shameless freeloader, correction, former freeloader, as my supply lines were abruptly cut off.  With $200 to my name I hit the road. I didn't know where but I had to go - somewhere, anywhere but here. Looking back, I was unhappy because I didn't want to accept the responsibilities of what I thought adulthood meant: getting a job. Some people escape through drinking and drugs. I was always too scared to get into all that mess but I had this incredible internal itch, one I had no idea how to resolve.  The closest thing to crawling out of my own skin was to pack up and leave.

I thought, "maybe if I started over things might be different", and gave myself til the end of the day to decide where to go.

The day passed. I had lunch. I walked about, going back in forth weighing pro's and con's.  Unequivocally, it was the lowest I'd ever felt.  What would my parents think?  All my brothers and sisters were either excelling in school or running successful businesses and here I was living out of my car sneaking into the YMCA to take showers.  I did not feel like a Nguyener.

One of my beliefs now is "clarity comes from action". Not because life necessarily gets easier but you learn more about what you need and what you can do without.  I was paralyzed from making a decision because I was so scared of the unknown and yet what I did know was Austin was not working for me.  I remember having taken a road trip to Houston with my friend, Thuan, on Bastrop 71 and how it crossed the Colorado more than 5 times. There was something about rivers I connected to.  Perhaps because I am a Pisces.  I was very much like water - fluid, perhaps too much and I yearned for guidance.  The River whispered an invitation and I happily accepted.  Instead of crawling out of my skin, I crawled along the Colorado with the moonlight guiding me southbound.  I felt a sense of calm and connectedness to my life, my Self, and to my environment like I had not in a long time.  (to be continued)





The river is a great teacher.

“You’re not good enough.” “You’ll never amount to anything; have you proven yourself before?” “You’re wasting your time, you’ll never make it.” “You’re an idiot for thinking you can.”

et, even while all of this profound negativity is being channeled toward the river, it continues to flow.

The river moves no matter what the atmosphere. If it’s raining, lightning or grey – it moves. The river channels all of its mind, body and spirit into the direction of its dreams.

When the river goes through a break up with its beloved – it doesn’t stop moving. It flows. It’s relentless. It’s wise.

Since the river is always flowing and moving – do you think it’s never in a bad mood? Wrong again – of course it gets in bad moods. It just moves in spite of them. It moves. It moves. It moves. The river also doesn’t take pleasure and often feels pain when others project their negative viewpoint on it. When this occurs, however, the trademark sound of babbling, rushing water continues, unimpeded.

It’s hard to believe, but the river worries sometimes too, just like you and me. Except you would never know by looking at it, as it never allows itself to become stagnant; it’s a rushing river my friend! It opts to run on the wisdom of its inner being and not be handicapped by some toxic emotion that would have it flow differently.

Also – the river blames no one. It takes full responsibility for its shortcomings in the past. It realized long ago that meditating on what it believes made it fail to live up to its potential has only led to its turning into musty canal water where slimy, green algae grows.

“All blame is a waste of time. No matter how much fault you find with another, and regardless of how much you blame him, it will not change you . . . ~ Dr. Wayne Dyer.” [emphasis mine]

One thing you can be certain of about the river is that it never dwells on the past. Ever. Do you hear the sound of the water rushing over the rocks? Tell me… when you hear the babbling water, when are you hearing it; in the past or the future? Neither. It’s only possible to hear this precious sound in the now.

Since the river channels all of its mind, body and spirit into the present, it has no room to dwell on the past. The river understands by letting go of the past entirely, allows for its potential in the present to reach its absolute zenith. If the river was to dwell on the past, it would lack the energy to flow and create its beautiful music.


It should be mentioned that I was sitting by the river a few weeks ago and sparked a chat with it. I said, “Tell me, River, how do you do it?”

It responded:

“No matter what obstacle comes my way, be it mental, be it physical, I’m going to direct my flow in the direction I want it to go.”